{"id":1571,"date":"2023-01-21T09:00:00","date_gmt":"2023-01-21T08:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/?p=1571"},"modified":"2023-04-24T15:03:01","modified_gmt":"2023-04-24T13:03:01","slug":"glueckliche-beziehung-vergeben-statt-verurteilen-now-is-the-time-to-start","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/glueckliche-beziehung-vergeben-statt-verurteilen-now-is-the-time-to-start\/","title":{"rendered":"Happy relationship? Forgive instead of judging! Now is the time to start"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>what harms your relationship A great destroyer is judgment. He&#039;s your enemy when it comes to forgiving your partner (or anyone around you). Get started today and free yourself from the burden of being critical of your partner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">1. Don&#039;t judge your partner for not being perfect (for you). Neither are you.<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Lovers are only too good at this: ignoring each other&#039;s weaknesses... sometimes against all reason.<br>Relationship researcher John Gottman describes contempt as the absolute destroyer of love. When he observes contempt in a marriage, he doesn't give the relationship much hope.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If feelings of contempt were a plant, then condemnation or judging is its root. For most roots, cutting off the leaves is of little use. Then new ones grow. The root has to come out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Judging is easy:<br>You see your partner&#039;s weaknesses and don&#039;t understand them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&quot;I just can&#039;t understand why you&#039;re like that. I wouldn&#039;t be as stupid as you if I were you. And you have no excuse for being like this.\u201d That, I would say, is the essence of judging someone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>With understanding you would say: \u201cThat is a problem in you. But I love you anyway.&quot; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This is why judgment is so destructive: the more you criticize your partner without understanding, the more you will only see the bad and what he or she is doing wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-9d6595d7 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-vertically-aligned-center is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-background\" style=\"background-color:#e6e7e9\">If you plan to destroy your marriage, do it with judgment! Judgment has a 100% success guarantee. Judgment kills any feeling of love you have for your partner; and in time his love for you will die too.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\">\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" data-src=\"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/toedliches-Gift-fuer-JEDE-Beziehung.png\" alt=\"vergeben statt verurteilen\" class=\"wp-image-1577 lazyload\"\/><noscript><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"676\" height=\"567\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/livesfullofgood.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/toedliches-Gift-fuer-JEDE-Beziehung.png?resize=676%2C567&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"vergeben statt verurteilen\" class=\"wp-image-1577 lazyload\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/livesfullofgood.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/toedliches-Gift-fuer-JEDE-Beziehung.png?w=940&amp;ssl=1 940w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/livesfullofgood.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/toedliches-Gift-fuer-JEDE-Beziehung.png?resize=300%2C251&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/livesfullofgood.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/toedliches-Gift-fuer-JEDE-Beziehung.png?resize=768%2C644&amp;ssl=1 768w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/livesfullofgood.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/toedliches-Gift-fuer-JEDE-Beziehung.png?resize=14%2C12&amp;ssl=1 14w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/livesfullofgood.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/toedliches-Gift-fuer-JEDE-Beziehung.png?resize=676%2C567&amp;ssl=1 676w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 676px) 100vw, 676px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">New thinking \u2013 a project for you (and your partner)<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>But change is possible. The solution, however, is not to simply stop saying anything critical. It&#039;s more about your thinking. Take some time today to think about what you criticize about your partner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And this time, take a critical look at yourself! Are you perfect that you have the right to judge your partner? If your answer is &quot;yes,&quot; then it&#039;s actually &quot;no.&quot; Because a &quot;perfect&quot; person knows that they are not perfect and do not have the right to judge those around them. \ud83d\ude09 <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And then take your inner compass and turn from &quot;I judge my partner&quot; to &quot;I don&#039;t want to judge my partner anymore&quot;. Change happens in small steps. Your inner attitude, what you believe to be true deep down in your heart, is the decisive factor. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Because with this new inner attitude, a whole new liberation and relaxation comes into your thinking. Your partner&#039;s mistakes are then no longer threatening. But to have that perspective I need God.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That&#039;s why it&#039;s so important for me to invite God into these deep thoughts, so that he causes in me what only he can do: that my heart changes. I can only change my alignment, but he frees my heart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Start today, and then again tomorrow. Don&#039;t give up because with God by your side you will become free and over time it will rub off on your partner too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center has-background has-medium-font-size\" style=\"background-color:#e6e7e9;letter-spacing:15px\">Be the change you want to see!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-buttons is-layout-flex wp-block-buttons-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-button\"><a class=\"wp-block-button__link has-black-color has-text-color has-background wp-element-button\" href=\"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/glueckliche-beziehung-investiere-in-diese-7-schritte\/\" style=\"background-color:#fbc7bf\">Happy relationship? Invest in these 7 steps <\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-buttons is-layout-flex wp-block-buttons-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-button\"><a class=\"wp-block-button__link has-black-color has-text-color has-background wp-element-button\" href=\"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/deine-ehe-lieben\/\" style=\"background-color:#fbc7bf\">loving your marriage<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>what harms your relationship A great destroyer is judgment. He&#039;s your enemy when it comes to forgiving your partner (or anyone around you). Get started today and free yourself from the burden of being critical of your partner.<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[54],"tags":[7,96,11,95,28,93,92,37],"class_list":["post-1571","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-loving-your-marriage","tag-beziehung","tag-divorce","tag-ehe","tag-eheprobleme","tag-krise","tag-marriage","tag-partnerschaft","tag-scheidung"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1571","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1571"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1571\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1633,"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1571\/revisions\/1633"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1571"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1571"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livesfullofgood.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1571"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}